"When everything goes to hell, the people who stand by you without flinching- they are your family." - Jim Butcher
"I got hurt. Really hurt. And sometimes when that happens, something inside me shuts off." -unknown
I've kept quiet on a couple things for several weeks now but I think it's time to add these events to the bump in our journey.
It has been 31 months since the kids were born. That is 2 years 7 months. For a brief history, the kids were born at 25 weeks. That is 15 weeks early and were critical for weeks and months. We couldn't touch the kids for the first several days of their lives, we couldn't hold them for weeks. They underwent many major surgeries and procedures. Every single day was unknown. We hoped, prayed, and worried sick about them every second of every day. Each day it was only Ricky and I. The nurses use to say all the time that we could have 3 visitors come see the kids. The kids got a total of 7 visits from "family" this includes both my family and Ricky's. Pretty freaking pathetic. Then after 5.5 long, hard, worrisome months the NICU journey finally ended and our son was the last to come home. Three days later we were sued by Ricky's family. This is after they spread rumors they later realized were untrue about Ricky and I abusing my nephew we adopted. They basically told anyone that would listen. The result, we were totally disowned by every single family member in Ricky's family.
So fast forward to the present. Ricky's parents are just "sick" about everything. It's been TEN years of his family being the most hateful people we've ever met in our lives. Not a single person has stood up for us and they've done some really just mean things for years. We are always the ones that are to blame- always. And we have always been the ones to forgive even though no one has ever apologized- ever. But we drew the line when A. no one was there for us and our kids, B. the rumors were spread about us, and C. we were sued.
As a mother I could never imagine spending the better part of ten years not in my kids' lives. It would never happen. My love for them is to strong. There is nothing in this world that could keep me away- mark my words. As a wife I would never stay married to or have my name on a law suit against one of my children. EVER. That is one thing that would end our marriage.
My question for the Patton family and grandparents, etc. is this, How has hating me and us for the past 10 years worked out for you? You will never get the past 10 years back and maybe Ricky and I appreciate time and realize how precious every day is more than each of you. If your true feelings are that you actually feel bad about what you've done to us and how you were not there, why have you not apologized? Your pride still too big? One thing I know for sure is that my kids will never be treated the way you've treated us. Never. They will never be exposed to the hate and meanness- ever. If you don't see us, communicate with us, and related to Ricky in anyway, you should examine your actions and your heart because a major apology is owed to us. Things will never be any different than they are now without apologizes. And that goes to everyone from Ricky's great grandmother on down the line to the parents. His sister has actually been the only one to apologize to us.
We live our life. We aren't the ones with regrets and tears about the situation because we've not done anything wrong. You take pictures off this blog or Christmas cards, etc because you aren't sent one. Why are you not sent pictures of our family? It's really a simple answer and you know the reason.
I'm ending with this, you each created this mess and it is not our mess to clean up. What if one of us die today, what if one or all of the babies would have died, would you be okay with yourself?
You will never meet anyone more protective of my family. I will protect Ricky, Brody, Gracie, and Madilynn with everything I have until the day I die. My focus is on these four people because they are the breath I breathe and no one will hurt them or disappoint them that should be family. And it has been proven that when the world is falling down around us, through the shattering and dust, when it's all settled, the FIVE of us will always be there for one another. That is family. That is our family.
Krista
Wednesday, January 30, 2013
Monday, January 28, 2013
Do not bring people in your life who weigh you down. And trust your instincts... good relationships feel good. They feel right. They don't hurt. They're not painful. That's not just with somebody you want to marry, but it's with the friends that you choose. It's with the people you surround yourselves with." -Michelle Obama
Saturday, January 26, 2013
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
BE
Every year I think of a word or saying that can be our chant, center us, focus our year. The first year was the famous "keep calm and carry on", last year was simplify which was perfect. Towards the end of 2012 I kept coming to contentment and be. There is something so simple with "be". Be content, Be grateful, Be happy, Be in the moment, just BE. I think we are finally at a place in our lives where we are so very content. We are happy, healthy, and love one another more than words. There is so much joy that everyday brings. The smiles and laughter swell our hearts and I think Ricky and I still ask is this really our life? We are so blessed. To be content means to be satisfied and there is so much peace with that.
The kids are doing so well. They say new words and sentences everyday and usually it's the funniest things that we can't help but laugh about. They are each learning to say Happy Valentine's Day. It's the sweetest thing but nothing as sweet as when they say "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, I love you" or Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, I love you". They are each so full of love and happiness. There is no ignoring them either. They'll pat our arm or leg and continue to say mommy or daddy until we give our full undivided attention.
Gracie is doing so good walking and her pace is faster and faster every day. It brings so many emotions when I think about her life so far and I do often. Every odd was against her, every diagnosis or unknown diagnosis has made her stronger, has made her fight harder. She is so very reserved, so cautious but she continues on, meeting goals, and doing things the doctors said she'd never do. We do have some pretty big health issues to deal with this year. She has to continue intense physical therapy on her leg. This week will be the first week she'll have three days a week PT. We need to follow up with her ENT about her paralyzed vocal cord and see if the injection into the cords is a route we'll want to try again. I'm not sure that we will but it's so hard because her vocabulary has taken off but her voice is a whisper because of that left cord. And then there is a big thing with her arms that is now affecting her range of motion. The pediatrician said it could continue to get worse or it could stay where it's at. She is unable to put her arms straight up which affects her being able to dress herself, brush her hair, and also affects the way she uses a spoon. These things aren't really a concern now because I can do those things for her but she does like her independence and as she gets older she won't want her mom doing these things for her. The other thing is we really don't want another major surgery. It's so heartbreaking but at the same time we sure don't want her to remember any of these things. It is nothing Ricky and I take lightly and if anything ever weighs on us, it's the health and choices we have to make for them.
Brody got his new glasses last week. He look absolutely handsome and some much older. The RX is so different than what he had so it's a really big adjustment for him. He talks a lot but he really gets to talking when he is exhausted and it's time for him to sleep. He literally talks himself to sleep. We often wonder who he is talking to in his room. He has full conversations, laughs, and claps to whomever he is talking to. He has very recently started to develop some bad habits while eating and we are trying to figure out what is going on to cause these new changes. I'm so happy he has not had any seizures since the last one in December and he is not on the medication for seizures anymore. I thought long and hard about that medication and all I could think was it was poison being put into his little body. I had such a bad feeling about it. I think it's so amazing that he is so smart and doing so well having the brain damage he has. Besides having glasses, you'd never know by interacting with him that he had such a rough start. It's so amazing.
Madi is something else. That child is just like me. Ricky says we even sleep the same. He has his hands full for sure. She is the mommy to Brody and Gracie and really takes care of them. Rather it be patting their backs, sneaking drinks for her bubby and sissy into the living room or snacks for that matter, their love for one another is so wonderful. She has to buckle her own car seat and heaven help us if we don't let her do it! I'm sure our neighbors can hear her protest. She wants to pick out her own clothes and shoes and it's a fight to keep a bow in her hair unless it's on her terms. The same goes with taking pictures of her. Her and Gracie can find their groove to any beat. If a dog or cat is in our yard that shouldn't be, she has no problem telling them about it. She is something else!
All three of the kids love our neighbors so much. They now say they want to go to "Lupe and Ronnie" and point across the street. It's an everyday visit and the few days it isn't, I have a problem on my hands. They have Mrs. Lupe and Mr. Ronnie wrapped around their pinkie fingers too, every time they leave they say I love you Lupe and I love you Ronnie all the while blowing kisses and waving. So sweet! That is the way these kids are though, so full of love!
Krista
The kids are doing so well. They say new words and sentences everyday and usually it's the funniest things that we can't help but laugh about. They are each learning to say Happy Valentine's Day. It's the sweetest thing but nothing as sweet as when they say "Daddy, Daddy, Daddy, I love you" or Mommy, Mommy, Mommy, I love you". They are each so full of love and happiness. There is no ignoring them either. They'll pat our arm or leg and continue to say mommy or daddy until we give our full undivided attention.
Gracie is doing so good walking and her pace is faster and faster every day. It brings so many emotions when I think about her life so far and I do often. Every odd was against her, every diagnosis or unknown diagnosis has made her stronger, has made her fight harder. She is so very reserved, so cautious but she continues on, meeting goals, and doing things the doctors said she'd never do. We do have some pretty big health issues to deal with this year. She has to continue intense physical therapy on her leg. This week will be the first week she'll have three days a week PT. We need to follow up with her ENT about her paralyzed vocal cord and see if the injection into the cords is a route we'll want to try again. I'm not sure that we will but it's so hard because her vocabulary has taken off but her voice is a whisper because of that left cord. And then there is a big thing with her arms that is now affecting her range of motion. The pediatrician said it could continue to get worse or it could stay where it's at. She is unable to put her arms straight up which affects her being able to dress herself, brush her hair, and also affects the way she uses a spoon. These things aren't really a concern now because I can do those things for her but she does like her independence and as she gets older she won't want her mom doing these things for her. The other thing is we really don't want another major surgery. It's so heartbreaking but at the same time we sure don't want her to remember any of these things. It is nothing Ricky and I take lightly and if anything ever weighs on us, it's the health and choices we have to make for them.
Brody got his new glasses last week. He look absolutely handsome and some much older. The RX is so different than what he had so it's a really big adjustment for him. He talks a lot but he really gets to talking when he is exhausted and it's time for him to sleep. He literally talks himself to sleep. We often wonder who he is talking to in his room. He has full conversations, laughs, and claps to whomever he is talking to. He has very recently started to develop some bad habits while eating and we are trying to figure out what is going on to cause these new changes. I'm so happy he has not had any seizures since the last one in December and he is not on the medication for seizures anymore. I thought long and hard about that medication and all I could think was it was poison being put into his little body. I had such a bad feeling about it. I think it's so amazing that he is so smart and doing so well having the brain damage he has. Besides having glasses, you'd never know by interacting with him that he had such a rough start. It's so amazing.
Madi is something else. That child is just like me. Ricky says we even sleep the same. He has his hands full for sure. She is the mommy to Brody and Gracie and really takes care of them. Rather it be patting their backs, sneaking drinks for her bubby and sissy into the living room or snacks for that matter, their love for one another is so wonderful. She has to buckle her own car seat and heaven help us if we don't let her do it! I'm sure our neighbors can hear her protest. She wants to pick out her own clothes and shoes and it's a fight to keep a bow in her hair unless it's on her terms. The same goes with taking pictures of her. Her and Gracie can find their groove to any beat. If a dog or cat is in our yard that shouldn't be, she has no problem telling them about it. She is something else!
All three of the kids love our neighbors so much. They now say they want to go to "Lupe and Ronnie" and point across the street. It's an everyday visit and the few days it isn't, I have a problem on my hands. They have Mrs. Lupe and Mr. Ronnie wrapped around their pinkie fingers too, every time they leave they say I love you Lupe and I love you Ronnie all the while blowing kisses and waving. So sweet! That is the way these kids are though, so full of love!
Krista
Friday, January 18, 2013
Parenting without a sense of humor is like being an accountant who sucks at math.
Thursday was not a good day. Anything that could go wrong did.
School mornings are hectic! I have the get the kids up, feed them breakfast, get them dressed, pack their lunches, make their drinks, put their names on their diapers, put socks and shoes on, braces and glasses, and give vitamins. All this has to be done and they have to be at school by 9:30 so your pretty much running non stop form the moment you wake up at 7 until drop off. On top of the normal, I had to run to the bank before the kids went to school to get cash to pay their tuition. It was also FREEZING outside but off we went to the bank. I get the cash but can't find my driver's license. I rip the car apart in the drive thru line at the bank and still find nothing. I swear the bank teller didn't give it back but of course he swears he did. I finally leave telling him to please call me should he find it. Get to the school, drop the kids off, open my wallet, hand the assistant the cash. I go home call the bank and they automatically tell me they don't have it. I told them to please check again and I'll wait on the line. Guess what??? The teller had my driver's license! So off Ricky and I go to get my driver's license. Ricky wanted to go off on the guy because he was doing his homework and had papers laid everywhere when he should have been worried about my bank transaction and getting my DL back to me. Anyway, we get back home and I get a phone call from the school that I shorted the tuition by $100. I told the school there was no way I literally left the bank and went to the school and I just cashed a check for the exact amount of the tuition. I told her I'd call the bank to have them count the teller's cash and call her back. By this time we are FREAKING OUT because paying an extra $100 would kill our budget. I get on the phone with the branch manager and tell her everything that has happened and that I really need her to count the teller's money because $100 is missing. 10 minutes later she calls back and guess what??? The teller short changed me by $100! The thing is I looked at my money but was so distracted because I couldn't find my DL. I can't believe this! Ricky flipped a switch on the branch manager and he went to get the $100. They sent him back with the money and a free bag for the car LOL! What a morning!
My great grandmother also passed away this morning. I don't have any details about it but I think it's really for the best. My aunt and uncle have worked tirelessly taking care of her for so many years and to have a disease that strips away your memory is horrible. To me in ranks second to cancer on some of the worse things that can happen. We would really like to attend her funeral but not sure if we will be able to make it. It would be nice to see some family members I probably won't see again. I have two aunts I'd like to see and have them meet my kids and a cousin would like to meet the kids and see us as well.
Now that my kids love everything Mickey and Minnie Mouse and Disney, I'd love nothing more than to take them to Disney and that brings back memories of the time I went to Disney. My great grandmother took my mother, brother, and I. When I think about Disney, I think about her. When I was younger, she signed me up for some little club where I would get Disney books. I have a lot of them and I'm so happy that my kids are now enjoying those same books. Memories are so important!
KP
School mornings are hectic! I have the get the kids up, feed them breakfast, get them dressed, pack their lunches, make their drinks, put their names on their diapers, put socks and shoes on, braces and glasses, and give vitamins. All this has to be done and they have to be at school by 9:30 so your pretty much running non stop form the moment you wake up at 7 until drop off. On top of the normal, I had to run to the bank before the kids went to school to get cash to pay their tuition. It was also FREEZING outside but off we went to the bank. I get the cash but can't find my driver's license. I rip the car apart in the drive thru line at the bank and still find nothing. I swear the bank teller didn't give it back but of course he swears he did. I finally leave telling him to please call me should he find it. Get to the school, drop the kids off, open my wallet, hand the assistant the cash. I go home call the bank and they automatically tell me they don't have it. I told them to please check again and I'll wait on the line. Guess what??? The teller had my driver's license! So off Ricky and I go to get my driver's license. Ricky wanted to go off on the guy because he was doing his homework and had papers laid everywhere when he should have been worried about my bank transaction and getting my DL back to me. Anyway, we get back home and I get a phone call from the school that I shorted the tuition by $100. I told the school there was no way I literally left the bank and went to the school and I just cashed a check for the exact amount of the tuition. I told her I'd call the bank to have them count the teller's cash and call her back. By this time we are FREAKING OUT because paying an extra $100 would kill our budget. I get on the phone with the branch manager and tell her everything that has happened and that I really need her to count the teller's money because $100 is missing. 10 minutes later she calls back and guess what??? The teller short changed me by $100! The thing is I looked at my money but was so distracted because I couldn't find my DL. I can't believe this! Ricky flipped a switch on the branch manager and he went to get the $100. They sent him back with the money and a free bag for the car LOL! What a morning!
My great grandmother also passed away this morning. I don't have any details about it but I think it's really for the best. My aunt and uncle have worked tirelessly taking care of her for so many years and to have a disease that strips away your memory is horrible. To me in ranks second to cancer on some of the worse things that can happen. We would really like to attend her funeral but not sure if we will be able to make it. It would be nice to see some family members I probably won't see again. I have two aunts I'd like to see and have them meet my kids and a cousin would like to meet the kids and see us as well.
Now that my kids love everything Mickey and Minnie Mouse and Disney, I'd love nothing more than to take them to Disney and that brings back memories of the time I went to Disney. My great grandmother took my mother, brother, and I. When I think about Disney, I think about her. When I was younger, she signed me up for some little club where I would get Disney books. I have a lot of them and I'm so happy that my kids are now enjoying those same books. Memories are so important!
KP
Wednesday, January 16, 2013
One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful. Sigmund Freud
We've got so much happening around here!
Monday we had the meeting set up for PPCD. I was literally sick about it and Ricky and I just couldn't bring ourselves to go. Are we making the wrong choice? Well, we'll never know for certain but I do know a lot. I know that for me as a mother and this being our family, we don't feel right sending our kids to a big school 5 days per week at 3 years old. I know that as a mother that has weathered one hell of a journey with my kids, I have to trust my gut and my gut tells me this isn't right. There is an unsettled feeling that I'm not willing to risk. I also know that my husband almost always goes with the flow and let's me make decisions for our family but when he also has concerns and does not want them to go, I need to respect that input. I also know I can arrange a much better education for them two to maybe three days per week than the classroom setting with all the distractions in a PPCD class. And Lastly, I know me and I know that if one of my kids were hurt in any way because of other kids having that outlet of hitting, etc. I would not be okay with it. It is very expensive for us to pay the kids monthly tuition and we've decided we'd do without certain things to make this happen. At the end of the day, I have to feel at peace with where my kids are and what they are exposed to. I need another year with my babies because they won't be "babies" long.
Another thing we have going around here is Gracie is in desperate need of a third day of Physical Therapy to help in her recovery from her leg surgery. There were many very wonderful things that came form her surgery but over half her leg was cut open on the back side in three different cuts. The nerves and muscles damaged was severe and she has lost so much muscle mass in that leg that there is about a 50% difference in size from her good leg. It's nothing a little extra work won't fix but two days per week isn't cutting it. It looks like we'll be adding Fridays at 9am to our schedule.
Ricky's work is so very busy. Apparently they usually book out 3 months in advance and at this time they are booked out 9 months in advance. That equals a lot of working. They've talked about working 6 days per week indefinitely. We don't like that much at all but the good thing is if they want the weekend off it won't be a problem. They don't want the to burn out but Ricky has been burn out from back when he was working 100 hours a week a couple years ago!
We are kind of on stand by right now. My great grandmother isn't doing so well and they fear she may pass anytime. She lives in AL but would be buried in central FL. The plan is for us to drive down for the funeral should she go home. Pretty bitter sweet. She has Alzheimer and 6 or 7 years ago was the last time I saw her but she didn't know who I was. She thought I was my mom. That is such a horrible disease because you can be completely healthy otherwise and have no control over your mind. My grandfather on my dad's side also had the disease. Anyway, we hope whatever is meant to be happens.
I'll update again soon.
KP
Monday, January 14, 2013
We grow so fast....
I took this picture this past Thursday. It was the kids first day back to school in 2013.
This picture was taken the first day of school in September 2012.
It's 2:30 in the morning. I'm up stressing out about our meeting with the school district this afternoon. Sometimes it's so hard to be responsible for other people's lives knowing your decision will affect them so very much. They've come so far. We've all fought every day, week after week, and month after month to get them where they are today. Their determination and will power is amazing. We cannot make the wrong decision. We just can't. I feel like we already want to say no way to the school because of the label that would be placed on them. Yes they have difficulties in some areas but not all areas. Just in September Gracie was really working hard in the picture to stand up. She was so nervous and that was the only picture I could get before she started crying. Fast forward to January and the girl is walking! They are progressing every single day and I know in my heart that one day they will not be labeled disabled. I know this because they are the strongest people I've ever known in my life. The past 2.5 years they've told this world to just wait and watch because they've got the biggest things they will accomplish! They are so amazing and I just hope we make the best decision for them. It's hard to see my babies grow up so fast. It seems like we've always been in a hurry to meet the next goal because they've been behind and here we are going to find out about sending them to Elementary school at 3 years old. Their little lives have been anything but the typical child. With the weekly therapies and all the doctors appointments and surgeries, it hasn't been fair. I just don't want them to grow up too quickly.
KP
Sunday, January 13, 2013
"And once the storm is over you won't remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won't even be sure, in fact, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm you won't be the same person who walked in." - unknown
These days I usually don't stress about things. I think when you've been where we've been where there has been a real reason to worry, all the other things seem small in the grand scheme of things. But I am so stressed out about PPCD for the kids. PPCD stands for Preschool Programs for Children with Disabilities. I am actually sick about this. Our first meeting is Monday. Ricky and I don't want our children in a class full of children with disabilities. That may sound bad and I guess people can take that however they want but our kids are so very smart. I've never been in denial about the kids and I'm not with this either. They really are smart. But what if we are missing something? What if PPCD will be the best for them? What if they need more curriculum than the two day a week program they are in? These are such big decision that we have to make for them and will affect them in such a big way. Yes, the kids do have disabilities but none affect their mind. Okay, maybe Brody a little with his brain bleeds but he learns very quickly. Plus a 5 day a week school? They will only be 3. I'm so torn with this.
We've been hibernating this weekend. Luckily the kids haven't caught any illness from school this past week. I'm just praying like crazy they won't get sick. They are still saying Merry Christmas 24/7!
I'll update again soon.
KP
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
Last year we took a little bit of the Christmas money the kids received and bought the My Baby Can Read set. Well when I say last year it was 2011 and it has sat unused. Pathetic I know. To my defense, the kids are so busy with therapies and we are usually just so exhausted. That being said, the kids speech has really taken off so I decided we should really start the program. I am so happy we did! It's amazing! The kids aren't reading yet of course but they are putting the words together with the picture. It even goes over colors! The program is really organized, they watch the fun DVD first which goes over about 25 words. Next we go through flashcards with them saying each word two times and then I show the picture that goes with the word. The last step is reading a book that does the same thing. They loved it and actually asked to watch the DVD again. Gracie named each color and said every word. This is huge because her speech evaluations put her at a vocabulary of about 25 words so for her to be able to accurately say 25 new words and be able to understand her with the loudness of her voice is huge! I am once again so proud of these little people!
Tomorrow is their first day back to school and I am so sick about it. I'm so worried about the Flu that is going around and it's so bad. Of course they've had their Flu shots (those are still a requirement due to them being preemie, etc.) but what I worry about is the other kids. So many of the parents send their kids to school sick. You wouldn't think that would be the case because it's only a two day a week program but they do. I can only imagine what the Flu would do to them. Please, please, please keep them in your prayers. I just pray that God will put a little bubble around them.
Potty training isn't going at all. Like not even trying. I really just don't know how to do it. I've read so many things and have tried so many different ways and they still pee the floor.
Monday Ricky and I will meet with the school district to get information about the PPCD program. We initially said no way but Brody's vision teacher said we should really consider it. I don't know what we'll end up doing. We've kept them in the ECI program specifically for the easier PPCD enrollment since ECI has been of no value to us from the beginning other than this but it's really hard to know what choice to make. I can't picture sending my little 3 year olds to a big elementary school. I just can't. Plus, Brody will probably qualify and maybe Gracie but we are pretty sure Madi won't. We'll then be left with what to do with Madi. We could keep her in the school they are in now but that is only two days a week and PPCD is 5 days a week. We could put her in a 5 day a week program but then I'd feel like she'd be getting a better education than Brody and Gracie. Plus, I'm a stay at home mom, this is why we decided for me not to work so I could take care of them. If they are out of the house 5 days a week (half days) I wouldn't feel right not contributing to our family. See so many difficult decisions. Plus, I've heard you are unable to view the PPCD classroom until your kids are actually in the class and I have a real big problem with that. It took me 5 visits before I finally knew where they are now was a good place to send them. Call me overprotective but these are my kids and we've fought so hard to be where we are today and I'm not jeopardizing that. Anyway, we do the first meeting Monday and they will be tested sometime closer to the end of this school year.
The decisions I/we make for our children weigh so heavy on me. It honestly feels like the weight of the world. This time is so important for their development and I don't want to make any wrong choices and at the same time I want them to learn everything they possibly can to their capabilities.
Our new Physical Therapist is amazing. Hands down amazing! She is one smart cookie when it comes to all things PT related and has quickly pointed out a couple things to me that the kids are weaker in and how she is going to strengthen those areas. The kids LOVE her and she works them so hard but you'd never know it because she makes everything a fun game for them. They are so exhausted by the time therapy is over that they eat lunch and pass out. It's wonderful to see the changes and I'm so excited to have her on our team.
It's been nice to get back into our hectic schedule. It was nice to have a break but this is our life and I missed the crazy :)
I think I'll end this book now. I'll update again soon.
KP
Tomorrow is their first day back to school and I am so sick about it. I'm so worried about the Flu that is going around and it's so bad. Of course they've had their Flu shots (those are still a requirement due to them being preemie, etc.) but what I worry about is the other kids. So many of the parents send their kids to school sick. You wouldn't think that would be the case because it's only a two day a week program but they do. I can only imagine what the Flu would do to them. Please, please, please keep them in your prayers. I just pray that God will put a little bubble around them.
Potty training isn't going at all. Like not even trying. I really just don't know how to do it. I've read so many things and have tried so many different ways and they still pee the floor.
Monday Ricky and I will meet with the school district to get information about the PPCD program. We initially said no way but Brody's vision teacher said we should really consider it. I don't know what we'll end up doing. We've kept them in the ECI program specifically for the easier PPCD enrollment since ECI has been of no value to us from the beginning other than this but it's really hard to know what choice to make. I can't picture sending my little 3 year olds to a big elementary school. I just can't. Plus, Brody will probably qualify and maybe Gracie but we are pretty sure Madi won't. We'll then be left with what to do with Madi. We could keep her in the school they are in now but that is only two days a week and PPCD is 5 days a week. We could put her in a 5 day a week program but then I'd feel like she'd be getting a better education than Brody and Gracie. Plus, I'm a stay at home mom, this is why we decided for me not to work so I could take care of them. If they are out of the house 5 days a week (half days) I wouldn't feel right not contributing to our family. See so many difficult decisions. Plus, I've heard you are unable to view the PPCD classroom until your kids are actually in the class and I have a real big problem with that. It took me 5 visits before I finally knew where they are now was a good place to send them. Call me overprotective but these are my kids and we've fought so hard to be where we are today and I'm not jeopardizing that. Anyway, we do the first meeting Monday and they will be tested sometime closer to the end of this school year.
The decisions I/we make for our children weigh so heavy on me. It honestly feels like the weight of the world. This time is so important for their development and I don't want to make any wrong choices and at the same time I want them to learn everything they possibly can to their capabilities.
Our new Physical Therapist is amazing. Hands down amazing! She is one smart cookie when it comes to all things PT related and has quickly pointed out a couple things to me that the kids are weaker in and how she is going to strengthen those areas. The kids LOVE her and she works them so hard but you'd never know it because she makes everything a fun game for them. They are so exhausted by the time therapy is over that they eat lunch and pass out. It's wonderful to see the changes and I'm so excited to have her on our team.
It's been nice to get back into our hectic schedule. It was nice to have a break but this is our life and I missed the crazy :)
I think I'll end this book now. I'll update again soon.
KP
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
Parents need to fill a child's bucket of self-esteem so high that the rest of the world can't poke enough holes to drain it dry... - Alvin Price
I am so excited we are back to our normal schedule.. well almost, the kids didn't have school Monday but they will Thursday and therapy comes on Tuesday and Wednesday.
I cannot wait for the kids to go to school on Thursday. Ricky and I are going to the shooting range while they are in school. I've only shot my gun one time! I'm thinking of getting my CHL but not sure. It's so weird to have to carry a gun to protect your family with all the crazy in the world. Can't we all just go back to the simple days like the Andy Griffith show?
The kiddos are amazing! Their vocabulary is expanding every single day. Madi will now tell us she is hungry. Speaking of hungry, the kids ate 3 eggs, 3 pancakes, and some bacon each the other night. They eat more than Ricky and I most every day but are so active with therapies and just being two that they don't gain any weight. Back to their vocabulary, they tell us Merry Christmas pretty much all day. I keep trying to explain to them that Christmas is over and only comes once a year but they don't care. They say it in a way that is a compliment so instead of saying things like I love you, they say Merry Christmas. The weather has been so cold that they've not been able to go outside and ride their Power Wheels. They are so busy with all their other toys though. We've had to do major organizing to get them all to fit in their rooms. I loaded the back of my Suburban up full of things for donations and had to go to Good Will. I'm so happy we stuck to the 3 gifts each.
Ricky's birthday is a month away! He will be the big 32!
KP
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
In hard times she had learned three things- she was stronger than she ever imagined, Jesus was closer than she ever realized, and she was loved more than she ever knew.
HI!!
New Years Eve came and went. Ricky ended up having to work late. While we were waiting on him to get home, I washed all the kids' sheets and blankets. The girls walked into (Gracie is walking now!!!) their room to watch me and when I was done both girls put themselves to bed. It was around 6:45 but I wasn't going to argue. It was raining when Ricky got home so our plans of doing sparklers were nixed. I think we were in bed by 10:30. We are young and crazy around here... can you tell?
Yesterday marked day 1 of potty training. It's the most maddening, stressful, disgusting thing to date. We immediately put big boy underwear on Brody and asked him if he needed to potty. Not 2 minutes later he peed his pants. He then got to sit on the potty for 45 minutes until he went again like a big boy. We asked them every 10 minutes if they needed to potty. Even set a timer. Madi went and peed in the hallway. It's like training a dog! She did end up using the potty like a big girl three times. Gracie went once peed in her pants once. We've been giving jelly beans as rewards and cheer like crazy when they do what they should. It's so easy to give up on this but the kids are officially 2.5 and have got to be 100% potty trained by their 3rd birthday for school reasons. Please, if you know of a potty training fairy, send her our way!
And can anyone believe we have 2.5 year olds??? They are doing some pretty amazing things. Madi wrote an M for her name last night! Gracie is walking - very cautiously but walking! Brody has decided to start jumping off things for fun- like the couch, recliner, step stool, etc. which gives me a heart attack! It's been such a great break from therapy and school but I'm really looking forward to getting back into the swing of things. Mornings just aren't the same without our therapist... it's too quite around here!
Juicing- Day 1
So Ricky bought me a juicer for Christmas. I watched the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It's got my attention so I asked for the juicer and luckily got it. Yesterday I ate no food only drank juice. Before anyone freaks out, you get every bit of nutrients and all the other things you need to survive through the things you are juicing. And it's all healthy stuff! Since I have PCOS which affects a number of things but one biggie is that you are automatically pre diabetic, I've decided I should probably change my diet around before I am diabetic, etc. Anyway, I woke up today feeling great! No swelling, no bags under my eyes, energized, and I lost a little over a pound! I'm consuming things I would have never eaten otherwise and it's not terrible. It takes getting use to "drinking" the flavors but doable. By juicing fresh fruits and veggies you get everything they offer which you don't when they are cooked. On another note, I might go vegetarian. If I do decided to consume meat or dairy it will only be organic by local farms. I strongly encourage everyone to watch Food, Inc. to see where your food is actually coming from. It's out of thin air that there are so many new diseases and illnesses and obesity these days. I plan to totally change the kids' diets as well but realize I need to do a lot more homework before doing so. I for sure will be eliminating gluten from their diets. Ricky and I feel that Brody's stomach issues are because of gluten. My goal is to address some health concerns we have for them in the kitchen first before doctors that never can figure out what is causing XYZ.
So here is a couple juices I've had so far so no one freaks out thinking I'm starving myself :)
1 mango, 1/2 cucumber, 1/4 yellow pepper, 1/2 jalapeno, 2 green onions, 1/4 cup cilantro, 1/2 lime
All fresh and raw, thrown in the blender, poured over ice, drank with a straw
My favorite: 1 green apple, 3 handfuls spinach, 6-8 kale leaves, 4 large carrots, 1 piece of ginger
2 large cucumbers, 4 cups cilantro, 1 lime, 1 poblano pepper, 1 golden apple
1 green apple, 2 cups spinach, 2 cups kale, 1/2 cucumber, 4 celery stalks, 1/2 lemon
See??? Would you have consumed these fruits in veggies in one day? I know I would have never! And because my body doesn't do what it should with glucose, I have to have a very small fruit ratio in each juice.
Anyone else want to juice with me?
Brody and I are going to order his much needed new glasses in a couple hours. So excited for him! His glasses have been bothering him so much the past couple weeks where he hasn't wanted to wear them at all... poor mister.
Hope everyone is having a fabulous 2013 so far!
KP
New Years Eve came and went. Ricky ended up having to work late. While we were waiting on him to get home, I washed all the kids' sheets and blankets. The girls walked into (Gracie is walking now!!!) their room to watch me and when I was done both girls put themselves to bed. It was around 6:45 but I wasn't going to argue. It was raining when Ricky got home so our plans of doing sparklers were nixed. I think we were in bed by 10:30. We are young and crazy around here... can you tell?
Yesterday marked day 1 of potty training. It's the most maddening, stressful, disgusting thing to date. We immediately put big boy underwear on Brody and asked him if he needed to potty. Not 2 minutes later he peed his pants. He then got to sit on the potty for 45 minutes until he went again like a big boy. We asked them every 10 minutes if they needed to potty. Even set a timer. Madi went and peed in the hallway. It's like training a dog! She did end up using the potty like a big girl three times. Gracie went once peed in her pants once. We've been giving jelly beans as rewards and cheer like crazy when they do what they should. It's so easy to give up on this but the kids are officially 2.5 and have got to be 100% potty trained by their 3rd birthday for school reasons. Please, if you know of a potty training fairy, send her our way!
And can anyone believe we have 2.5 year olds??? They are doing some pretty amazing things. Madi wrote an M for her name last night! Gracie is walking - very cautiously but walking! Brody has decided to start jumping off things for fun- like the couch, recliner, step stool, etc. which gives me a heart attack! It's been such a great break from therapy and school but I'm really looking forward to getting back into the swing of things. Mornings just aren't the same without our therapist... it's too quite around here!
Juicing- Day 1
So Ricky bought me a juicer for Christmas. I watched the documentary Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It's got my attention so I asked for the juicer and luckily got it. Yesterday I ate no food only drank juice. Before anyone freaks out, you get every bit of nutrients and all the other things you need to survive through the things you are juicing. And it's all healthy stuff! Since I have PCOS which affects a number of things but one biggie is that you are automatically pre diabetic, I've decided I should probably change my diet around before I am diabetic, etc. Anyway, I woke up today feeling great! No swelling, no bags under my eyes, energized, and I lost a little over a pound! I'm consuming things I would have never eaten otherwise and it's not terrible. It takes getting use to "drinking" the flavors but doable. By juicing fresh fruits and veggies you get everything they offer which you don't when they are cooked. On another note, I might go vegetarian. If I do decided to consume meat or dairy it will only be organic by local farms. I strongly encourage everyone to watch Food, Inc. to see where your food is actually coming from. It's out of thin air that there are so many new diseases and illnesses and obesity these days. I plan to totally change the kids' diets as well but realize I need to do a lot more homework before doing so. I for sure will be eliminating gluten from their diets. Ricky and I feel that Brody's stomach issues are because of gluten. My goal is to address some health concerns we have for them in the kitchen first before doctors that never can figure out what is causing XYZ.
So here is a couple juices I've had so far so no one freaks out thinking I'm starving myself :)
1 mango, 1/2 cucumber, 1/4 yellow pepper, 1/2 jalapeno, 2 green onions, 1/4 cup cilantro, 1/2 lime
All fresh and raw, thrown in the blender, poured over ice, drank with a straw
My favorite: 1 green apple, 3 handfuls spinach, 6-8 kale leaves, 4 large carrots, 1 piece of ginger
2 large cucumbers, 4 cups cilantro, 1 lime, 1 poblano pepper, 1 golden apple
1 green apple, 2 cups spinach, 2 cups kale, 1/2 cucumber, 4 celery stalks, 1/2 lemon
See??? Would you have consumed these fruits in veggies in one day? I know I would have never! And because my body doesn't do what it should with glucose, I have to have a very small fruit ratio in each juice.
Anyone else want to juice with me?
Brody and I are going to order his much needed new glasses in a couple hours. So excited for him! His glasses have been bothering him so much the past couple weeks where he hasn't wanted to wear them at all... poor mister.
Hope everyone is having a fabulous 2013 so far!
KP
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)