Power is being told you are not loved and not being destroyed by it - Madonna

I went to order Brody's new glasses today. After an hour there I was told they never ordered the samples that they promised to order over 6 months ago. I was not very happy. Looks like we will have to drive about an hour away to order new ones and then make that same trip to pick them up. You would think being in such a major city there would be more places that carry his glasses.
When Brody and I got home I took Madi to get her first little mani & pedi. She did so well and told the little lady thank you so many times. We picked out pink nail polish and she loves it. Gracie will go next time. I wasn't sure if I would be able to handle both of them at the same time there.
I applied to Sam Houston State University today!!! I'm majoring in Business Management and minoring in Human Resource Management. Since I'm almost finished at community college, my advisor advised me to go ahead and apply to SHSU. I won't actually be ready until at the earliest Spring 2013 but probably Fall 2013 but you can apply and be accepted with the number of credit hours I have. I hope I'm accepted in. My advisor thinks I won't have a problem but I don't exactly know how the process works.
Brody got himself into BIG trouble tonight at dinner. He decided he wasn't going to eat but hold food in his mouth. I'm so over the tantrums so he not only had to eat all of his dinner but went right to bed after. It seems the hissy fits are getting worse by the day!
The girls and I did the works on the front and back yard. Of course Gracie was so mad at Harper and Hoss because they kept licking her in the face but other than that, all was well.
That is all for now.

KP

Someone else is happy with LESS than what you have

hmmm... that is something to think about.

Lord cleanse me of anything that breaks your heart.

I took Brody to his retina specialist today. It was my first time taking him but he has seen her before. First off, I think she is such an amazing doctor! Seriously just LOVE her! She actually retired but came out of retirement because she was board. Usually older doctors are not up to date on the latest and greatest but that is not the case with her. She is so very knowledgeable and just amazingly brilliant and a joy to speak with. 

So on to Brody's eyes... his vision teachers and I have been wondering what his lower fields of vision are and if he has any. To put this in prospective for our readers, basically when you walk, you see the ground without looking at it. We've also wondered what his peripheral vision was as well. The answer is simple, he has none. Now this isn't great news but it's a reality when a child has laser eye surgery. His window of vision is probably about a 45 degree angle all the way around if that makes sense. Basically if you put your hands in front of you in a 45 degree angle you would be able to see what Brody can see as far as his fields of vision. Some crappy news is that she wouldn't have done laser eye surgery on him for his ROP back when he was in the NICU. She would have done injections in his eyes which wouldn't have destroyed all his nerves. She did say that we made the best decision out of the choices we were given and that Dr. Coats (the doctor that did the surgery) only does the laser and won't do the injections. She said she won't do the laser and only the injections so the patients she sees that parent's won't do the injections have to go else where for treatment. If only we knew then what we know now... but you can't live life full of what if's.

His glasses RX is actually a little too strong from the last visit which was six months ago. She doesn't think his vision has improved but he has adjusted and learned to use his vision a little better. She also firmly believes that he will never lose his vision and that it will continue to remain stable. AND!!! the vision he does have is actually pretty good vision. MEANING she does not truly feel he is legally blind but we won't know more until he can really comprehend what is going on and being asked of him. She is confident that his nystagmus is due to his brain bleeds.

Before we left she told me this, "Whatever you do, do not allow the school to put him in classes with retarded children. He is not retarded and if they do this he will begin to mimic the other children's actions. He is very smart. He does not need a white cane and do not, do not, do not, let them even mention braille. He does not need this. He is fine. He will be fine." Her words were powerful to me and that little boost of confidence I need as we start the process for PPCD (school for special needs kids that starts at 3). 

We won't need to go back until his 3rd birthday which is amazing! A lot of the unknown was answered today and my goodness, all I can think is how amazingly blessed this little boy is. I am so very thankful for all the heartbreak and unknown we've gone through though because I've learned so much that I would have never given a thought to. How many times do we take our vision for granted? I think we go our entire lives never given it a thought but this has taught me so much in that you can see without your eyes. It may be your thumbs or ears, etc. but your eyes are not required to SEE. It goes hand in hand with FAITH. 

This journey my little family and I have been on could have only been written by our Creator. I am so lucky I can't see where our path will go and what we will face because if I could know, I know me and I would miss the most important things, the little things, big things, the things, just to get to the finish line. I would never wish the pain the kids have gone through or the struggles they've each faced on them. As a matter of fact, I hate the things they've gone through but my goodness the miracles that have come through it all. We are at a point and have been for a while where the news gets better and better. We don't have the worries and the struggles and can step back and look at where we've been and where we are now. I can never express how grateful I am and I don't think anyone besides Ricky can really know where we've been. We are so very lucky.

Anyway, that was our day and what a wonderful day it was. 

KP 

You have brains in your head. You have feet in your shoes. You can steer yourself any direction you choose. Dr. Seuss

I am a stay at home mommy again! The good news is I'm going to be able to actually go to school rather than do everything online. I'm super excited about that. There was a breaking point months ago when I realized I had too much on my plate. I used to love school and found my self hating it. I didn't have time for anything but work and school work and that was no fun for anyone. 

Anyway, at almost 26 I pick school because if I don't pick it now, I'll never meet my goal of finishing. 

I'll update again soon. I should have more time to give to the blog now too :)

KP

This business of training little humans for life is a mind boggling process

pic is from our first trip to Destin, Fl

We are going back to FLORIDA!!! This time we are going to Pensacola. We picked here because it's closer than Destin and the babies loves will be with us :)  We are so excited to take them on their second vacation but first big getaway!! We aren't really planning to do anything other than lay on the beach, build sandcastles, and create amazing memories. 

Sunday Ricky and I are going to see Cirque Due Soleil Kooza show. We have amazing tickets that put us on the 8th row. I've been wanting to see one of the shows for years now. I'll be sure to post a review. 

We had a garage sale on Saturday. My neighbor joined in and we were pretty successful. I got rid of a lot of baby stuff we no longer use. Feels good to have some space again. Ricky had to work that afternoon which was weird to not have him around on a Saturday but I decided to landscape the backyard. I started at 2pm and it was hot. I unloaded 50 landscaping rocks and 1 yard of dirt. Talk about hard work. I was almost finished but it got dark out so I had to finish it up on Sunday morning. Our neighbor gave me a little Oak tree she had been growing in a planter and I added that to our backyard. It looks really nice out there. I still need to add some more landscaping (there was nothing at all back there- not even a tree) but will do it little by little. The kids swam in their pool while I was working. They love to swim! 

This is another busy week. Luckily Ricky is able to take the kids to all their appointments so I can work. Brody has to get an x ray of his lungs to make sure they've cleared up tomorrow. Wednesday all three have a dentist appointment. It's a general check up because they are now two. Thursday Brody has an eye appointment with his retina specialist. Add in therapies and it's a full week! 

I'll update again soon.

KP 

Be the girl you want your daughters to be. Be the girl you want your son to date.

I LOVE this quote. It really speaks volumes.

So it's absolutely no surprise that time is my enemy but I've been thinking a lot about goals, life, etc. I keep coming to the conclusion that I'm a little crazy for putting so much on my plate and having such high expectations, dreams, and goals. It's a struggle because you are suppose to have dreams so big they scare you and what is life without goals? The problem I have is that my kids are growing up before my eyes and although I'm with them 24/7 I feel like it's still not enough.
Which brings me to my other struggle... Enough and More. You see, I don't want to just pass through this life with the barely get by mentality. I'm not talking financially but with everything I do. I don't want to be a half ass mom or half ass wife, worker, student, etc. I want to be the best... I want to be enough... so no one around me is wanting more and I'm not expecting more out of myself.
So I've been on the crazy "soul searching" quest the past couple days and I've realized that I need to slow it down. I've realized what I want the most is what is also making me crazy because of the unrealistic expectations I have of myself.
I don't want to wake up one day when my kids are grown and have regrets or regrets that Ricky and I didn't do this or that or even regrets about my career. I don't want to wonder what I've done with my life or the past 5 years. I want everyday to mean something and be worth remembering.
I guess I do believe in fairy tales still because I do believe you really can have it all but you have to first find a realistic balance.
When my kids are grown I want them to have the best memories of their childhood and the fun times we create. I don't ever want them to feel like they aren't the most amazing gifts Ricky and I've ever received because it's simply my biggest wish in life for them to realize how amazing they are and how in love we are with them.
Anyway, that is my Friday and it's been a really stressful week. I'm looking forward to the simple life this weekend.

Kids update: All is good. They are just amazing and I'm the luckiest momma in the whole wide world to call them mine :)

KP

When you're down and out remember, God gives his hardest battles to his toughest soldiers.

Anyone ever heard of Macroeconomics? That is my latest summer class I'm taking that started this past week. It's a cross between math and Psychology. It's pretty dang hard because it's has such confusing concepts. Luckily it's only 4 weeks long but I sure hope I can pass this class. 

I am having a big ol' garage sale this weekend. My neighbor (the one we do play group with) is joining in so it will be huge. We have so much stuff we need to get rid of. Three of everything really takes up a lot of space. We are also going to plant the plants I bought this past weekend in the back yard however, my crazy dogs have already almost ate an entire plant... drives me crazy! So far they've ate two entire orange trees. I'm talking roots and all. Yes, we feed them everyday and a lot! Any recommendations on how to get them to not eat the plants? They don't chew up the kids toys or anything else just the plants. My neighbor across the street has a little oak tree she is giving me for the backyard too. I hope they leave that alone. 

In other household news, our utility bills are through the roof! Our water bill has been $160 per month and our light bill has been $320 a month!! OMG! 

The kiddos are doing good. Their favorite thing is to go for a ride in their new stroller. They love being outside. I can't wait until the weekend where we will have much more time outdoors. I see a bunch of swim time in their futures. 

That is all we know for now. I've pretty much given up on posting pictures here unless I find a bunch of time on my hands in the very near future. 

I'll update soon.

KP

Sunday = Funday!!

Sunday Funday!! We've had such a good little Sunday around here. We made a trip out to Garden Ridge, Target, and Houston Garden Center. Target is having a major summer clearance sale and we snagged another bubble machine and bubbles for super cheap. Houston Garden Center is having a huge sale too and every plant is 70% off!! We got another peach tree and five other plants for $34! One of the plants I bought today, I bought the exact same plant a couple months ago from Lowe's for $17. I got it today for $6!!! SCORE! We are going to start landscaping the backyard. Currently this isn't a single tree or plant back there. Although I do have to admit the pumpkins and watermelons did awesome but they've since been picked.
Yesterday Ricky converted both the girls' cribs into toddler daybeds. They are so excited about their new big girl room. We really didn't want to take them out of cribs yet but Madi was climbing out of her crib and the Pedi said we needed to go ahead and get her into a toddler bed so she wouldn't hurt herself. And of course you can't change one's bed and not the other so Gracie's was changed too. We put them to sleep last night and I checked on them a couple of hours later. Gracie had made her way into Madi's bed and they were sound asleep. It seriously is the sweetest thing to see. I am so happy my girls have each other.
Brody is still in his crib. His bed also converts but with his vision we aren't ready to let him free. He is back to normal and you wouldn't even know he was in the hospital just a week ago.
The kids went swimming in their little pool earlier today and Brody was up walking around without holding on. He drives me crazy with this because he CAN walk but will only do it without crying when he WANTS to. Any other time it's a huge whine fest when he is walking and he wants to throw himself on the ground in a fit. That lazy little boy....
We have a follow up appointment with the Pedi tomorrow to check on all their lungs and see how the medications are working. They seem to be a lot better but who knows until we see the xrays. This is our last week of summer preschool. Our Tuesdays and Thursdays will be free until after Labor Day. Speech therapy starts tomorrow and I'm very interested to see how they will respond since it will be in home this time around. Overall I think Speech therapist are a little "different" they seem to speak in weird low monotype tones... can we say awkward?? Anyway, maybe this time will be different?? We shall see.
I'm so burn out with school.... OMG I'm over it! It pains me to keep going forward! I should have taken some breaks but haven't and with a full workload since I've started back last fall, work, and life, it's a whole lot. I'm also past ready for another vacation. Oh yes I am! I think I've hit insanity because I've thought about taking the kids on a Disney cruise. It's not secret I really only like my kids so to even consider going just shows my mental state LOL :)
Little Momma aka Madi is holding Brody's hand showing him how to walk. They are walking the living room side by side holding hands. Yall are missing out on all this sweetness my friends!!

Until next time,

KP

Because someone we LOVE is in Heaven... there's a little bit of Heaven in our home

Alright, I just don't have time to keep up with this blog the way I use to. I guess having two year olds demands more time and energy! That and school... don't ask!

Anyway, it has been raining cats and dogs outside which I love. Last year the entire state was holding prayer for rain and now people are being flooded out. It makes the temps so nice and the house is cold... in July! 

The rain means we've not been able to really be outside and the kids miss that a lot. They like to spend their afternoons after I'm off work creating masterpieces with chalk on the sidewalk. They also love bubbles like a lot! and momma got a new stroller which I'm in Heaven! It's a jogging stroller and is so easy to steer and the kids LOVE it!! 

Today we dressed the kids up like cows and went to Chick Fil A. It was hilarious! It's cow day there and if you dress up you get a free meal. I didn't realize that and just thought you'd get free fries or something but their entire little happy meals were free. Speaking of happy meals... they ate almost the entire thing! Each!! These kids can put away some food. Of course you wouldn't think that by looking at them but they eat a lot. 

We aren't doing anything fun this weekend because I've got homework. Yay! Said no one ever! I really have a love hate relationship with school but I'm continuing on. 

The kids start Speech therapy next week. Our days will be so busy again. Next week is also their last week of preschool for the summer. I'm sad about it. They've learned so much in just 5 weeks and love going. It seems Madi has learned the most which she is in the older 2 year old classroom. The kids in there have actually already started during three. Even though she is the smallest, she holds her own very well. She can count to 3 and says a lot of the parts to her ABC's. It's so cute because she says ABCEFHIJLMNOQRSTWXZ now I know ABC Next time sing with me. How cute is that??? And isn't that so awesome?? She just turned 2! She also sings Itsy Bitsy Spider and makes the little spider walking up with her hands and sings Twinkle Twinkle and open and closes her hands while singing that.   I ran into the director of the preschool at the grocery store this week and she commented on how well all 6 of their teachers said they were doing. It is another confirmation that they are in the right program. I couldn't have asked for a better experience. 

Well, that is all I know. There are a ton of new pictures on Facebook if yall are looking for pictures. Since I got a different phone months ago, it is way harder for me to get the pictures of my phone and onto the computer. I don't have time to mess with it right now. Anyway, you are more than welcome to find me on Facebook and see them there. 

I'll update soon.

KP 

Brody's hospital stay

Brody has been admitted into the hospital. 

Sunday night at 11pm Brody woke up crying. This has never happened so Ricky and I both went to check on him. He was a blueish color and was in severe pain. We scooped him up and got him into the kitchen. He kept holding his breath for so long he was turning blue because of the pain. We got the girls up and loaded everyone and rushed to St. Lukes in The Woodlands. Because of his status, we took priority over everyone and had no wait. They took an XRay of his chest and stomach. His chest film showed he either had Pneumonia or a constriction in his right lung. His stomach XRAY showed either a possible blockage or that his intestines had "telescoped" into itself. They started and IV and gave him Morphine for the pain which didn't help and started papers to transfer him to Texas Children's. Ricky took the girls home around 2:30am. They were so exhausted but so well behaved and sweet.
Brody and I got to ride in an ambulance siren, lights, and all. We arrived at TCH at 4am. Then Brody decided to drop his breathing saturation down to 86! which scared the crap out of everyone and was immediately put on oxygen. They gave him more morphine for pain but this time doubled the dosage from what he got at St. Lukes. That helped but didn't really make the pain go away. They scheduled us for an ultrasound of his stomach. Around 6am we were wheel chaired back to ultrasound. It was a very painful experience for him because touch would bring him so much pain. At 7am the ER doctors came in and said we would be staying at least one night, that he either had a telescoped intestine or blockage in his intestine and that the surgery team would be called. We waited and waited. Ricky showed up around 10am. He had to wait for the nanny to get to the house and get everything situated there before he could come up. We moved into a room around 11. The inpatient Hospitalist came to visit and were more convinced that he had extreme constipation.
A very long story short, Brody had extreme constipation although he never stopped pooping. They were able to wean him off oxygen late last night and he was able to come home this afternoon.
It has been one hell of a ride the past couple days. The moment the machines started going off about his oxygen levels and they had to put oxygen on him, I felt I was in hell reliving the horrible experience of the NICU. I pretty much lost it. Oxygen levels are nothing I want to ever have to worry about again.  It was so hard seeing Brody in so much pain but I'll tell you one thing, that kid has one hell of a pain tolerance. I compare what he was going through with labor. He would hold his breath to try to get through the pain and would exhale so loudly because he was hurting so bad. He really didn't cry at all. He is one strong and brave boy.
Another thing I didn't want to ever relive was not having my family under the same roof. I don't like it one bit and I am so happy and thankful we are all together again today.

I'll update again soon.

KP

Fair isn't everybody getting the same thing.... Fair is everybody getting what they need in order to be successful.

We had such a fun day today. We loaded everyone up and headed for Kemah. Ricky and I had never been and wanted to check it out and today seemed like the perfect day.
The kids had so much fun and each one road their very first roller coaster rides. They each enjoyed the rides so much and had no fear! We took a long little train ride around the entire Kemah Boardwalk. I think they liked that the best. We had lunch at Landry's that was scrumptious and the kids ate seafood for the first time and loved it. There weren't a lot of people there so we really didn't have lines at all. Heck, at one ride, I didn't even have to get out. Ricky would bring me a different kid after the ride was complete. Talk about awesome! The only thing we learned is that we should have went in January or February because it was so hot outside! The kids drank a lemonade and two regular size bottles of water! That is a whole lot for them. Two awesome things that happened: we didn't have to pay for parking and we only had to buy one pass for the rides (for me) which allowed all the kids to ride unlimited times for free!! With food and all it was only $100 which is cheap for a family a five and a day of fun (out of the house). SCORE!
Next week it seems to be back to normal with the nanny coming her three days, MDO, and therapy. I've got one class finishing up and one starting this week as well. I'm getting closer and closer to that degree... thank goodness! The funny thing is, I often wonder what in the world I will do when I'm not in school and have that extra time. I can dream, right?

I'll update soon!

KP

I hear you. Raising kids and running a house keep me busy, too. I also have this little gig on the side called a full time job. Oh, and this other thing called full time college student.

I have AWESOME news!!!!

Gracie Ann just WALKED on her own!!!! I stood her up and she walked from me to her daddy without holding on and from her daddy back to me without holding on!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
We were all 4 screaming and a cheering her on! That is how we do things around here :)
This is so amazing and just proves that no matter what the challenge, she is up for it and always has been. You can't stop her!!!!!
Gracie Ann we are beyond happy, proud, and thrilled at what you've just accomplished!!!
We love you so much!
Love, Mommy and Daddy

"If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. - Einstein

"I hold it up and show my buddies, Like we ain't scared and our boots ain't muddy, but no one laughs, 'Cause there ain't nothing funny when a solider cries. An' I just wipe my eyes. I fold it up an' put it in my shirt, Pick up my gun and get back to work. An' it keeps me driving me on, Waiting on letters from home. - Letters from Home, John Michael Montgomery

Freedom isn't Free

Happy Fourth of July!! 

The Patton Family 

Some Bday party pictures

My child, you worry too much. I've got this, remember? Love, God

OKAY FINE... We will go back public because I know yall love it :) Cross your fingers that all the bad people are staying off our site now. I didn't realize how many people were actually visiting our blog to check in on us ;)

So what the heck has been going on with us??? A LOT!!!

The kids started school on June 12th and did AMAZING! They still are doing great at school and love it. Gracie Ann WALKED into school for the first time her second week using her walker. We were amazed at her.
Brody landed in the ER with a nasty stomach virus on June 24th. He had been so sick starting Friday evening and by Sunday evening we had enough. He couldn't hold down food, water, or medications. Ricky and I loaded him up per the Pediatricians recommendation and headed to St. Luke's in The Woodlands. It was the absolute best hospital experience we'd ever had. They were so sweet and took such wonderful care of him. Luckily after IV fluids, IV medication, and an X Ray to make sure his gut was okay, we were able to go home about 11pm that night.
I finished and PASSED my Speech glass taught by satan.
My doctor tested me for tumors/cancer and we waited.... and waited for the results and thank Heavens I'm tumor and cancer free!! We are still running some other test trying to figure out whats going on. I don't know what is going on to even tell you anything.
Madi got the stomach virus this past week.
All three kiddos are now on breathing treatments every 4 hours because of allergies! ALLERGIES for crying out loud!!
Friday I pretty much lost my mind. Yep, it decided along with my patience to take a hike. Why? Oh, because after an hour and a half at the picture place, we walked out of there without a single picture. You know the ones I do every birthday because it's their birthday??? Those!! Why? Well Gracie would't smile for a single one of them and pretty much looked like she hated being in our family in every shot. By the time we actually got her to love her family again Madi was OVER IT!! I mean throw her hair bow on the ground then bang her head on the ground. Yep! And that was our sign it was time to go.
Saturday was their BIRTHDAY!!!!! It turned out AMAZING!!!! We had it at The Little Gym and I can't say enough how amazing the facility and staff was. I didn't have to worry about a single thing and was able to enjoy every second of their party. We had a wonderful turn out of around 30 people. Everyone seemed to enjoy themselves as well. Two of our old NICU nurses were there and both took my camera and snapped over 400 pictures. I told you I didn't have to worry about anything :)
They got way too many gifts... way too many and Uncle John is now building them a big ol' toy box. They also got about $400 that will go into their growing savings accounts! As well as gift cards. They are so lucky to have so many people that love and care about them. Thank you all so much. I hope you each truly know how much we appreciate everything.
Gracie had an ENT appointment today. It was just a check up now she is a big girl and TWO! We found out she has an ear infection and that her lungs sound "really bad". The ENT won't need to see her again until she is three unless we aren't getting anywhere with speech.
Speech you ask? Yes, we are starting speech back as soon as the insurance approvals are in.
I promise to post pictures soon but in the meantime, if you are on Facebook, find me!! I post pictures there and updates all the time. Usually daily!
It's nice to be back... I think! I really hope all those people are gone and we won't have to worry about the negative out there.
I'll update again soon!

Krista

Second birthday

Just one year ago! You've each grown so much! 

When I look back at your first birthday post, pictures, video, and memories, you are not the same children you were one year ago. In so many ways it's like those children aren't each of you.
Our days use to be filled with specialist appointments, therapy appointments, medications, and being in a survival mode. Today we thankfully rarely see the inside of Texas Children's Hospital, Madi you aren't even in therapy now, and none of you are on any medications. We use to see the Pediatrician every month. Now it's only when shots are due or if you have a fall or get sick. We were given a lot of grim news during our NICU journey and thankfully most every prediction we were given has not been true. We were told Brody wouldn't even be aloud in public for the first two years for crying out loud. Even though we were at the very bottom, I'm ultimately so very thankful for that. It's made each accomplishment that much better and has kept us so humbled, so grateful, and our hearts where they belong- with God.  The survival mode has switched to a daily life and just living mode. The preemie gap is quickly closing and each day you are all progressing beautifully. Your doctors and therapy team often comments that you are not the same children on paper that you are in person. It's true. I often go back and read your NICU history from the hospital and today knowing what I know now it scares me. You each went through so many extremely critical things and the fact you were born 15 weeks early and survived let alone are thriving is a true miracle. Your lives not only are book worthy but my loves they are written by stars in the sky by our Healer. What a gift!
I can't seem to find where the time went from that Thursday, July 1, 2010 at 9:11pm to today two years later. Your daddy and I love each of you unconditionally and although we are so proud and excited at each new thing you do, we are also sad because we know these moments are so very precious and in a blink of an eye you will be grown. You've each changed the way we look a life, others, each other, everything. We are so lucky to call you our children.
When we are out and about just living life, we are always stopped by someone in amazement. A lot of times they say things like bless our hearts, what little miracles, we are so blessed, better you than me, etc. and we often get complements but out of everything we've been told one really mattered. We were told your daddy and I are really good parents because the way each of you act. You are all happy, loving, and just sweet babies. That was such confirmation that the way we our growing our family is right. However, your daddy and I can't take all the credit, your personalities are just amazing and each unique. Thankfully that has not changed and if I had just a handful of prayers left, I would pray that would never change. You each love one another so deeply and the bond you share is so strong. It is a highlight of my day to see you each so happy to see one another in the morning when you wake up, when you gives kisses to one another at bed time, when you all wrestle around and play peek a boo and are laughing hysterically. Life is forever changed and I couldn't picture a life any other way or any happier.
You each must know that your father is so wonderful. He is so very protective of each of you and his love for you is unmeasurable. He works very hard to provide for us today and for our future. The way you each interact with your daddy is different. I couldn't picture this journey without him and I'm incredibly lucky I don't have to. Life is sometime stressful and things get hectic but at the end of what ever "big deal" is going on, he and I are still very much in love with one another and each of you. We have a common goal for our family and work everyday to better ourselves and our family. I can't say what our future will hold, only God knows that but we do wish to expand our family God willing. What we know is family is so very important and we don't really have much family. We'd love to have a big family and change that :)

Brody,
My man! Madi now says "my man" too these days. Little boy, slow and steady wins your race. It's never changed from the moment you came into this world and I would be surprised if it ever does. You have taught me so much about life. Because of you I know you can see without sight. I also know that Elmo and Sesame Street is very funny to watch without having to have your sight because you face your back to the tvHoss" and "Harper" and love your puppy dogs like any little boy should. You are the most handsome little boy I've ever laid my eyes on and when we are in a group of people I'm so proud to tell people "that's MY boy!" I am so very proud you are mine but more than proud, I'm grateful. Two years later I still remember your NICU stay and all those days and nights by your bedside. I know you've always heard me. I know you've heard me in the darkest hours when the angels and God were beside you. Thank you so much for fighting the good fight my boy. I can never picture this life without you. Your sweet little voice saying momma is music to my ears. It warms my heart and touches my soul. For all the bad news we were given and all the pain is erased when I see your smile and hear your voice. My promise remains the same, I will spend the rest of my life making your pain and struggles up to you. But, I will always push you because the sky is the limit my love. One thing I need you to know is no matter how hard I may push you my heart only has the best intentions for you. I know you know that but you must never forget. I am so excited for your future and this next year.You do so many amazing things that I can't even think about what this next year will even be like! I know have a favorite picture of you. This picture tops all pictures you have ever taken. It's not by some fancy photographer in some swanky studio. Nope, this picture is at your birthday party and you are RUNNING! This pictures says so much and thank you for being such a super hero. My MAN! Happy Birthday Brody. Thank you so much for fulfilling my life.
I LOVE YOU!
Mommy

Gracie,
Where do I begin? You are so beautiful. Your look has matured so much this past year and you no longer look like a baby, you look like a little girl. You have such thick hair and so much of it. You are no longer our little itty bitty, you've grown so much and are so long! However, you still are our little squeakers. You have been through a lot this past year. If it wasn't your arm issues with the "is it a bone infection? No, it's a broken bone" to you might have this disorder or the doctor is sure it's this disorder. Well, you have no disorder! You went through surgery to strengthen your voice and help your paralyzed vocal cord that was a total flop. Us putting you through that for no reason was one of our lowest points. It was around that time I decided to stop listening to the doctors, all the specialist and start listening to what you were telling us and what felt right to me. Even through all the test and procedures, all the therapies, you never changed who you are. Of course you've had your days but your smile and innocence hasn't been lost. You are still very much the sensitive one. If your brother or sister cry or are mad about anything, you are too. You care so much about those around you but you know what? So many people that we have surrounding you love you so very much. You pretty much light up anyone's day with your smile and your eyes because when you smile so does your eyes.  I think the thing I love the most is that you are really starting to want to do thing just mommy and her girls can do. We paint our nails and do our hair and you and sissy just love it! Us girls can get lost in our little world but bubby always keeps us in line :) It's such a joy to have you as a daughter and I appreciate you so very much and love you more than you could imagine. With that being said, you are still a daddy's girl and there is no arguing about it. And you have him wrapped around your little pinkie finger. There is not one thing in this world your daddy wouldn't do for you. With so many things this past year that we've been faced with, he has done his homework and made changes and things happen to better things for you. We've watched you turned into a little girl with such big determination push a walker around and WALK into school. The day I witnessed you moving that big walker around was such a realization that you, my child, can and will do anything you want to do. The day you STOOD in the middle of the floor with no help, not holding on to anything was such a monumental moment. You were so mad but even through the tears you did it. The thing that amazes me is how strong you are. You have fought every day of your life to be where you are today. I only hope I could be as successful as you in this life. Just like when you were a little over a pound, fighting for every breath, and when you got NEC and was at the brink of death, you've never given up. You see, every single day when I was at your bedside, you were so small, so frail looking. Little did I realize that you were telling God and those angels that you needed to be here for your daddy and I. Gracie, you didn't need us, you never have but we've needed you since the day we found out there was three. You keep moving mountains and telling everyone around you to stop reading those medical books and start watching you! You are amazing my love and I thank you so much for making my life what it is, wonderful!
I LOVE YOU!
Mommy

Madilynn,
Everyone says we are just alike. That you are my mini me. There is a bond between you and I that I am so grateful for. Those weeks after you came home from the hospital, I will forever be grateful for. You have taught me so much and when there wasn't room to mess up with Brody and Gracie and their medical needs, you forgave me for all my shortcoming I've made with you. I appreciate that more than you will ever know. Your eyes are the prettiest blue and sparkle. You are just beautiful. Your personality is something else. You giggle and laugh hysterically and make your sissy and bubby just as happy. You are always the leader and are the little mommy to Brody and Gracie. From getting them drinks, snacks, and patting their backs, to teaching them how to "jump", it's all wonderful and priceless to watch. And then there is your other side. You nearly gave momma and daddy a heart attack when you climbed on the sofa and fell, getting a concussion. Of course that was an automatic trip to the Pediatrician and then to get a MRI to make sure your head was okay. It was but you pretty much convinced the entire hospital that MRIs must hurt with the way you were screaming and trying to get off the table. Oh, you are so my child. Then there is the strong will. That side is sometimes hard to deal with and hard to know what angle to take. Just as you teach bubby and sissy how to do those great things, well you also teach them the things we wish you wouldn't do. For example, if you get really made you bang your head on the ground.  No matter the surface. And unless you really want to sleep, you will scream and that makes Brody and Gracie scream too. You are such a little diva. Nothing is funnier than to see you go into my closet, put my heels or wedges on, walk all the way in the living room, put your pearls on, your bracelets, and purse. You are so sassy and it amazes me how equipped boys and girls come. I didn't teach you any of that you just did it. This past year not only did you start walking but you are now in full running mode most all day. You love to dance and twirl around which is one of mine and your daddy's favorite thing to watch. You also LOVE Sesame Street. Elmo and Abby Cadabby are your favorite and you dance and clap your hands during the one show y'all are aloud to watch everyday. School was a big event. You really don't like separating from me so I was really nervous but you were a champ! You kissed me bye, let go of my hand, walked in your class, turned around to wave bye to me again, and just like that, you were no longer a little baby but my big girl. You continue to be the trail blazer in the group and we are so thankful for who you are and where you are. You have the sweetest voice and continue to say more words everyday. You've very recently decided you should learn how to climb out of your crib. You've now mastered the task. I guess the joke is on daddy who thinks you need to be in a crib until you are three... guess you showed him. This past year has been just wonderful and I am so excited to watch you continue to grow and develop. You are such a joy to have and I couldn't picture my life without you and am so thankful I don't have to.
I LOVE YOU!
Mommy

We love you each so very much and are so excited we've been given the honor to raise you and help you develop and grow. Everyday there is something that makes us laugh, smile, and happy. I look forward to the future and to see what is in store for each of you.
We must thank our dream team for helping in each of your successes this past year. You each know who you are and we won't name names but to our: OT, PT, vision teachers, and Pediatrician, We could not be where we are today without each of you and we appreciate your dedication to each of our children.

Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday, Happy Birthday
(Mommy makes everyone sing happy birthday three times)