That was a preemie outfit!
I finally was able to live a little one year ago. She taught me so much and I will always be so thankful for those weeks her and I had alone.
Madi, you have grown so much in one year. I'm just so lucky you are mine. You are my girl for sure and I just love how you favor me. I hope that always stays the same. You help me find a smile and a laugh in our hard days. I can't even get on to you when you do something you really shouldn't because you just look at me and smile and crinkle your nose. You are a hoot! Gosh Madi, I just couldn't love you anymore than I do and I hope you always know and feel how much I really care and love you. I just pray that I can be the mom you deserve. You are one special girl.
In a couple hours, Brody will have his eye appointment with the Nova Clinic. I hope we get some good news because we could sure use some.
I'm so glad I was reminded that God understands you on your bad days. It seems like this month has been horrible and it's only the 15th. I wish that the kids' health care providers would give the same amount of effort they would give to their own kids and stop the careless mistakes. It is so exhausting to be on such high alert 24/7 with their care. A year later I must admit, I'm exhausted. I've hit a limit. The demand of every day life is so much. To unload and set up the stroller, get the kids out of the car into the stroller, fight elevators, people invading our space- touching my kids- being in their faces, second guessing every word the doctors say because lets face it, what doctor has not made mistakes with my kids at this point, therapy, trying to occupy Madi while the other two have their doctor visits, feeding them while out of the house, loading them back in the car, taking the stroller apart, putting it in the car, the hot car, I mean it just goes on. I don't want to sound like a complainer but I'm physically and emotionally exhausted. I've ran a marathon for one year and 9 months. I just need to rest for a second. Those fairytales of a perfect pregnancy with no complications, perfect birth, healthy baby, etc. well, you just have no clue to be quite honest. But I must admit, I'm far more blessed. I have 3 babies that are so amazing and are just wonderful little beings. So, I must push through this and keep on keeping on.
Krista
