Has anyone ever taken the time to listen to the lyrics of Forever Young by Rod Stewart? Another love song to my babies!
Anyway, this weekend has been pretty bad. There are so many layers to me that no one knows or understands. There is such a deep wound in my heart, in who I am as a person. I try so hard to move past it. I try to never think about certain things that I know I can't handle. Sounds pretty crazy that I'm a grown adult and can't deal with things. Well it is very true. I ran into someone this past week that was a very huge part of my life as a child. I can't get it out of my mind. I know I can't handle the circumstances. I know I'm not strong enough. I know that no matter what, in this life things will never be ok with a certain part of my life. There will always be such a deep pain there. I lost so much as a child. I grew up way too fast.
I strongly believe that every single thing happens for a reason. I know that I have to give my kids the very best I can. I never want them to experience pain or hurt from their mom or dad. It is my job to protect them and I will until the day I die. I see first hand how things that happen in childhood follow us as adults and I have to break that cycle with my children. It is so very important to me. I want my kids to have all that I didn't. I'm not saying my entire life was bad because it wasn't. It is so hard for me to even find words for the way I feel... I just hope and pray that me or Ricky don't die before my kids are grown....
On to happier things! I'm so excited to start our fall season! Tomorrow starts my classes at church. I'm looking forward to the positive this will bring. I love everything about fall. Really, it is a season to recognize everything you have to be thankful for. I sure have so much but the top three on my list are Brody, Gracie & Madilynn. Every single day I think about where we've been and where we are. I know this blog is a picture into that but I wish I could just have all of you here with us to see everything and all the ways we've been blessed. I feel like the luckiest girl in the world to just have these babies here and healthy. I'm so thankful for all of our supporters. The phone calls and emails are so very appreciated. Some days the only thing that has gotten us through this journey is all of our cheerleaders out there.
As of today we've had 9000 visitors to our blog. That is a lot of prayers for my family and it means the world to me. So, those are just some of the reasons I love fall the season of thanksgiving! {Also, Thanksgiving was my daddy's favorite holiday}
With much love and thanks,
Krista
